Saturday, January 26, 2013

Dealing with What You Did : 9 Ways to Handle a Guilty Conscience

By James Warrington


If you've ever had a guilty conscience, you know how complicated it can be to go on with your life just like before the event which caused your guilt. Taking steps that may help you make up for the damaging event or put it in your past can help you deal with your guilt and move ahead with more positivity.

Consider applying these techniques to help you deal with a guilty conscience:

1 . Come clean. If you can go to the person you wronged, completely realizing and accepting what might happen to your relationship, you might be able to purge your own conscience.

* However , if you have a guilty conscience, it's often because you committed a severe mistake against someone you really love and care about. You might feel as if you can never come clean with that individual due to possible consequences.

* If you're likely to choose this approach, consider it thoroughly before you implement it. Reflect both on how this information will affect the one you wronged as well as how coming clean will certainly affect you. It may be best to use the written word.

2 . Note down your misdeed and an apology. Read it aloud to the particular person, or hand it to him to read.

3. Admit to yourself that you're human. Be honest with yourself about what you did. Then, recognize that every person makes mistakes and that your objective is to avoid creating the same error again.

4. Learn from it. Spend some time pondering about the event and the mistake you made. Put yourself back into that mindset and ask yourself, "Why did I do it? " Recognize where you were emotionally at the time and how damaging that "place" was for you. What can you learn from the encounter?

5. Find spiritual guidance. If you belong to a religion that motivates confession and reconciliation, follow through with it! It is truly uplifting and motivates healing from your wounds.

6. Spend some time performing volunteer work. If you believe you should do something in order to "cancel out" the act you committed, plan time for you to do some humanitarian work in your community. It may be addressing envelopes for a local charity to deliver flyers or answering a neighborhood organization's phones for 2 hours a week.

* Remind yourself that you are "paying" for your misdeed by doing good stuff for others. Maintain positivity.

7. Concentrate on performing one good deed each day. Maybe you can provide your neighbor a lift to work. Or you can clean your dad's car. Look around you. You'll notice folks everywhere doing everyday responsibilities. Hop in and help them. It will feel good and restore your faith in yourself and your positive actions.

8. Give funds to a cause you believe in. No matter if it is to aid the Haitians get on their feet or to give toward the restoring of New Orleans, give a decent portion of change to assuage your conscience. Will it help? It will surely make a positive difference to someone, perhaps to you as well.

* Recognize within yourself, "I'm giving this money to show I'm still a good person, despite the fact that I made a grievous mistake. "

9. See a therapist or counselor. If you think you're going to burst from the weight of your error, it may be time to consult a professional about it. Therapists are expected to respect your privacy within limits as specified by your state. You'll be surprised at how good it feels to say out loud what you did.

* A counselor can help you in coping better with your emotions, learning to leave the error behind you, and grow to be a much better person for it.

Coping effectively with a guilty conscience will take time and diligence on your part. Set to work using the above strategies. You'll be thankful you did!




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